I’ve managed to keep up and I haven’t missed a day yet. It has the added benefit of acknowledging and appreciating something small about the day before I go to bed. They say it takes 40 days (or is it 90 days?) to make a habit. I’ve never been very good about journling before but it seems easier to commit to this since it’s for me and later for the girls too.

Officially announcing to the Blogosphere our new little one, we call her little bear. Bug is a great big sister and we are enjoying new babyhood in our home again. The first month was a little rocky with 2 ER visits and a brief  hospitalization for little bear but she is healthy and thriving with no lingering health problems that we know of. On top of that we had other surprises (like plumbing problems) and life changes (new job) at the same time and but the gray cloud of stress has lifted for me finally. Now my attention is kept busy with the busy life of a toddler and, I have to boast a little here, a happy and content baby that smiles and giggles all day long.

It’s emotionally challenging to raise two kids and it can be exhausting to meet the needs of two other people and still remember to eat and wear clean clothes in public. I worry about giving enough and the right attention to each child. I feel guilty when I don’t have enough time to do everything I want to do.

I had the kids Halloween costumes planned out before the birth, cowboy for Bug because she loves her Woody doll (side note: she has not seen Toy Story yet), and Mr. Potato Head regardless of gender for baby. In typical me style I waited untill the week of Halloween to start the costumes. In my defense I had just birthed a baby and the only piece I needed to sew was the vest. But then Little Bear and I spent the weekend in the hospital and we missed Halloween. Bug didn’t really know what she was missing but I grieved that I couldn’t be there with her, and finish her costume, and see the joy on her face when she understood this crazy tradgathering begging for candy door to door. In the end my mom finished Bug’s costume and had lunch with us in the hospital. Then we went trick-or-treating at my sisters house the next week. One house worth of candy was really enough anyway.

I never did finish the Mr. Potato costume so we put together some baby bee tights with a vintage dress and booties. Whalla! A vintage bee. I’m already making plans for next year. There will only be so many years when I will have the authority to make then cute costumes. All this is to say I actually feel like I’ve gotteof in the groove of parenting. Really. After two births, two kids, and two years, I feel more competent and more confident in my role than ever before. Somehow with a 3 month old and a toddler I feel more productive than I did a year ago with only one darling to keep up with.

Now I know the secret of those parents that actually sew things for their children, work from home, and brush their hair. They have babies that don’t need to be held all day long and nursed ever 40 minutes night and day, like our new Little Bear. It helps when your toddler enjoys fetching things for you and your husband is very appreciative too.

I’ve been waiting for this for a while now. I heard Bug’s little voice reading herself books on the potty while I cleaned up from dinner. The best part, she was reading “Doggies” by Sandra Boyton which cosists mostly of different dog barking sounds. It’s funny to hear her interpretation. There is always a lot of reading in our bathroom, but usually my presence is required for the pint sized visitors. New independence around every corner these days. This moment was sweeter than when she locked herself in the bathroom stall at Costco yesterday.

I think the last time I blogged was about a year ago when I had great hopes of blogging regularly. It’s hard to start up after so long, I want it to be a great post with an amazing photo. But the pressure to do something great or even good just kept me away. So here I am again with a dark photo and nothing particularly interesting to say.

Mostly it’s been hard to post because I usually like to write about a project I’m working on or have just finished and I have not finished much in the last year. And of course there’s always excuses about time, blah blah blah. So no promises, but I would love to be a little more regular about blogging than my annual post.

My new garden gnome is standing on one thing I made this year, a mushroom cover for the ottoman. I think I dreamed about making this all year and finally did for Little Bugs birthday. I was very pleased with myself. I don’t think I’ll leave it on all the time, maybe it will just be for holidays and special occasions.

No promises, but I hope to be back soon.